Finding Sovereignty by Meeting My Personal Archetypes

By Dorian Martin, I Start Wondering Founder

Many have been intrigued by my column, My Quest for Sovereignty over My Own Life, in which I described my commitment to implementing the word “sovereignty” as my overarching annual theme for 2024 and 2025. 

Now, well into the second year, I have found that becoming sovereign over my own life has been about looking at my own life with a clear, loving, and discerning eye. 

That requires contemplating several overarching questions:

• Who do I want to be in this next chapter? 

• Where do I want to go, and what do I want to do in the time that remains? 

• What’s stopping me? 

• How can I embrace the challenge of living my life with integrity?

  
  

Archetypes

Answering those questions has involved looking at archetypes: the universal themes, symbols and cyclical patterns that you’ve probably heard of in literature, psychology or other areas. 

I have noticed that my behaviors have contributed to periodically feeling like I’m the main character in the movie, “Groundhog Day” – that I’m repeating the same behaviors over and over without moving forward. What can I do to shift out of these repeating patterns—and ultimately begin to learn the lessons that go with them? 

While I continue to explore many modalities, looking at my life through the lens of archetypes – inherent psychological patterns that affect our life’s path – has been a particularly effective avenue for transformation. 

According to writer and medical intuitive Caroline Myss, each person has between 10-12 archetypes that show up in their lives. Many potential archetypes can be part of our make-up—ranging from the Mystic to the Bully to the Engineer to the Hermit. 

“Archetypes are the keys to our personal power,” Myss writes in her book, Archetypes: A Beginner’s Guide to Your Inner-net*. “I have witnessed dramatic changes when people awaken to this power …. Upon discovering which archetypes are guiding your life, you step into the core of your being, perhaps for the first time. It’s as if you have finally put on the clothing you were destined to wear.”

Sometimes, it’s easy to spot a personal archetype. For instance, I’ve always enjoyed exploring different topics, chronicling the stories of a wide variety of people, and noticing issues that our culture ignores. Not surprisingly, I have a prominent Journalist archetype that really emerged when I took a high school journalism class. That archetype has informed my professional life, including the creation and ongoing work of I Start Wondering.

Yet, we can also fall into an archetypal trap dictated by the culture. For example, many cultures assume that every woman has a prominent Mother archetype that is completely devoted to nurturing her family. Several major religions have mother figures, such as Mother Mary in Christianity, Khadija in Islam, and Quan Yin in Buddhism, and American culture is replete with these archetypal figures, including June Cleaver, Clair Huxtable, Marge Simpso,n and the main character in the movie, “Mother Dearest.” And then there’s the holiday we all make an effort on,  Mother’s Day, which was spearheaded by social activist Ann Jarvis after the passing of her mother in 1905.

Despite the prevalence of this archetype in the United States and around the world, the culture’s traditional view of the Mother archetype hasn’t been part of my make-up. Instead, I have expressed my Mother archetype in different ways, through being around children while working in education, having had numerous pets, and encouraging nourishing relationships. 

And I’ve also come to believe that certain archetypes can strengthen and take the lead, depending on the stage of life we’re in as well as our environment. So, while I have the Mother archetype, my life has been informed by the time when I grew up when women were increasingly stepping into the workforce and by my female role models, who were career women. Ultimately, that combination propelled me to invest my energy into my Journalist archetype.

Archetypes of Survival

Myss also describes four archetypes — Child, Victim, Prostitute and Saboteur — that everyone has. They need special attention and bring forth different issues, fears and vulnerabilities that must be overcome to truly live an empowered life.  

“In doing so, you come to see these four archetypes as your most trusted allies, which can represent spiritual as well as material strengths,” Myss wrote on her website. “They can become your guardians and will preserve your integrity, refusing to let you negotiate it away in the name of survival.”

As I read Myss’ and others’ writings on archetypes, I chose to delve specifically into these Archetypes of Survival in relation to my theme of sovereignty. I started with the Child Archetype, which already was showing up regularity during the pandemic. Engaging with my inner child has taken time to begin to work through—and I’m not necessarily done yet. But I’ve had more bandwidth to begin to explore the other three in this group.

This column will give a brief overview, and I plan to expand on these archetypes in future columns.

The Child

The Child Archetype shows up in adults in many ways, including the orphan, needy child, the abandoned child, or Peter Pan who doesn’t grow up. In fact, just look at today’s news or social media and you’ll probably see the Child Archetype emerging in the actions of politicians, business leaders, and reality television stars. 

Yet, when healthy, this archetype can be an important part in adult life. Now you’re probably asking, “What does an integrated Child archetype look like?” Here’s what Myss has to say: 

“The mature personality of the Child archetype nurtures that part of us that yearns to be lighthearted and innocent, expecting the wonders of tomorrow, regardless of age. This part of our nature contributes greatly to our ability to sense playfulness in our lives, balancing the seriousness of adult responsibilities.”

The Victim 

Myss notes that the Victim archetype helps stoke the fundamental survival instincts that we need to navigate the world around us. Yet, we often can fall into the trap of embracing the victim role to gain sympathy. Just think of the blame game — “It’s all the fault of the government/my parents/my ex/my boss/fill in the blank”— and you’ve got the basic way that victimization can run rampant in our lives. And the sad part is that by taking this approach, we can quickly give away our power by becoming passive or taking inappropriate action and, thus, avoid taking responsibility for making meaningful changes in our lives.

The Saboteur

Through wallowing in low self-esteem, we default to self-destructive behaviors that mark the Saboteur archetype.  That can mean staying in a specific situation instead of changing or not taking appropriate steps. In her best-selling book The Let Them Theory*, Mel Robbins writes about a friend who kept putting off advertising her design business — and then was distraught when another woman in her community who was less experienced in design work started getting attention based on her social media posts. Ultimately, Mel’s friend sabotaged herself by procrastinating on what she needed to do to build her business.

The Prostitute 

While it’s tempting to think of this archetype as sexual in nature, that’s not its meaning. “The Prostitute Archetype brings us lessons in integrity, raising issues around trading body, spirit, or identity for security or financial gain,” Myss said, noting that this archetype represents one of life’s tests. How willing are you to sell out your own power? Or where are you holding power over another?

Navigating Through Chaotic Times

Delving into these archetypal patterns and unwinding how they are functioning in me has been life-changing. It’s work that I continue to do — and even small shifts in perspective are leading to significant change. 

Dorian cuddles Hero

For example, earlier this year, I started worrying about some proposed policy shifts that could have had the potential to affect my income. I briefly sunk into a “poor me” mentality, but as a result of this work, I quickly recognized I was engaging the Victim archetype. As a result, I decided to become my own cheerleader and began taking proactive steps to expand my freelance client base. While those policy shifts have not come to fruition at this point, I feel like I’ve created momentum that will help me be the captain of my own ship and navigate the waves of change ahead instead of sinking into despair.

This is just one example of many in my life that have emerged from these efforts. As a result, I’m also much more present and able to respond instead of reacting, which increasingly gives me more sovereignty over my own life.

Examining one’s own behavior in relation to archetypes provides a lot of fodder.  I encourage you to delve into it for yourself. Here are four of Caroline’s YouTube videos to explore:

• The Wounded Child

• The Victim

• The Saboteur

• The Prostitute

Let me know in the comments what revelations you make! 

*Proceeds from the purchase of these books will be used to support I Start Wondering's programming for women who have reached mid-life and beyond.