Her Own Woman: Meet Brenda Grays
Updated: Dec 22, 2022
How would you describe yourself?
I am a woman who has reinvented herself! I am hard-working, driven, enthusiastic, and friendly. I have faced many challenges, from teenage pregnancy to being a woman who has not allowed society to determine who I am by stigmatizing me because of my race, educational level, etc. I'm passionate about my purpose, which is helping and serving others. No matter what problem arises, I can find a solution. I would describe myself as an open and honest person who tries to be fair in everything I do. I learn lessons from the worst days.
What is your proudest achievement thus far in life?
My proudest achievement is having been a young single parent and raising my daughter to meet challenges head-on. She is a successful businesswoman at a Top 10 America corporation and an entrepreneur, having started a brick-and-mortar cupcake business, a grab-and-go site, and a food truck business.
What is the best thing about being an older woman?
The best thing about being an older woman is I now have knowledge about life that I have learned through experience and challenges over the years. I am now able to give back and share with the younger generation.
What has been the most challenging thing about growing older?
The most challenging thing about growing older is learning my limitations when it comes to taking care of my body. I have learned that my body needs extra care, and additional supplements to help me maintain it. I’m eating healthy and being mindful and not taking life for granted.
What has been a life-changing moment?
I’m recently divorced and starting over! Sometimes when there is a major change in life, there are feelings of failure and fear, but I am learning that I didn’t fail. These situations were there to point me in the right direction--and the best things in life are on the other side.
Everything that has happened to me was preparing me to handle this moment of opportunity to make me better. Yes, it is still painful, but I am embracing growth in myself and finding ways to stretch. My marriage was a chapter of life that is no longer here. Now, I am more alive at 65! Taking care of myself mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually has become even more important
What's one thing you've become more passionate about as you've aged?
I have become more passionate about who I am and understand my purpose and pain by reflecting on it to use it as a tool to change the way I think and behave. Trusting my gut to get from where I am currently to where I want to be--and that is becoming the best version of myself.
What is one thing you want to do in this season of life?
One thing I want to do in this season of life is RETIRE! To be free so I can take my passion to the next level by building my Zumba and Mary Kay businesses and my professional speaking career.
What would you tell your younger self about aging?
Learn lessons from the worst days. Life is a lesson, and every day you have an opportunity to do better than you did the day before. You have a choice; be positive and always be intentional.
What's one thing you've left behind?
I initially left behind my passion for having a business in health and exercise—but it ended up following me. So now I am pursuing that passion through teaching Zumba classes.
What do you want people to say about you at your funeral?
That I loved the Lord, I loved life, I loved my family, and I cared for people. I enjoyed laughing and being my true self.
What's your best health tip as you grow older?
Get your rest, exercise, and eat in moderation. Take your necessary vitamins to help maintain your body’s health.
What's your best beauty tip as you grow older?
Beauty is only skin deep. Good skin care is essential at any age and healthy habits in your 20s and 30s can strengthen and prepare your skin for the effects of aging down the road.
Who is a person you admire and why?
I admire Iyanla Vanzant because she offers inspirational stories that have truly been enjoyable and spiritual experiences. Her books, podcast, YouTube presentations, and social media accounts encourage and remind me to be who I am and to not doubt that I can accomplish what I want.
One of her books contains this statement that really resonates with me: "If you know who walks beside you, you can never be afraid." So, I try to remain open because there is something bigger than what we know that is going on.
What is one of your favorite resources (book, podcast, movie, website, etc.) that you want to share?
I want to recommend two books: “One Day My Soul Just Opened Up” by Iyanla Vanzant and “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Proven Personal-Leadership System Based on Timeless Principles of Effectiveness” by Dr. Stephen Covey.
Describe the rest of your life in five words.
Grateful, Attitude, Love, Forgiving, Hopeful
You can connect with Brenda at: